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here sits a bare blank page
mirroring life, a future ahead.
do things get easier with age
will peace meet me when I'm dead.
despite public image of who i am
I've always just been just me.
bright outlook, outlook dim
meaningless nothing help me see.
what i thought was true and real
never came close to whats to come.
all i allowed myself to feel
counts as nothing as it comes undone.
any merit gained is cloudy and illusive
in spite of what has been accumulated.
i dare not ponder the inconclusive
what is, is, and can't be debated.
a final step leads to an unknown place
uncertain and unsteady the passage.
i hold on to hope, trust and faith
my mission to deliver a message.
concealed, i await the arrival
pray i can resonate the word.
hold no concern for survival
only to prove good, do as i should.
let me receive and bring here
the results of my suffering.
let others hear without fear
results my experience impart.
may my hard lessons serve
as shortcuts on others paths laid.
testimony to courage and nerve
ease of living to followers i may save.